"Desperate" by Fireflight

Lyrics:


Seek and you will find, they say
But I've been looking everyday
For a way past this wall
That's in front of my face.
I'm on hands and knees
Searching for my faith.
I know there's so much at stake
But I don't know if I can take
One more pat on the back saying I'll be okay.
Can't you see me whole life is in disarray?
You've got me desperate.
I know You hear me,
Would You give me a sign?
Reel me in before I've fallen in line.
You've put me on a path I don't understand
I'm standing on a ledge waving my hands.
You've got me desperate (do You see me?)
Desperate (do You hear me?)
Desperate (will You help me?)
You've got me desperate.
I know You're my only hope
The only One who truly knows how it feels,
what it's like when it all starts to fall
You're the One I can trust who hears when I call.
You've got me desperate.
I know You hear me,
Would You give me a sign?
Reel me in before I've fallen in line
You've put me on a path I don't understand
I'm standing on a ledge waving my hands.
You've got me desperate (do You see me?)
Desperate (do You hear me?)
Desperate (will You help me?)
You've got me desperate.
Some things I'll never figure out
Until I let hope erase my doubt.
You've got me desperate.
I know You hear me,
Would You give me a sign?
Reel me in before I've fallen in line.
You've put me on a path I don't understand,
I'm standing on a ledge waving my hands.
You've got me desperate (do You see me?)
Desperate (do You hear me?)
Desperate (will You help me?)
You've got me desperate.
You've got me desperate. (Oh do You see me?)
Desperate (do You hear me?)
Desperate (will You help me?)
You've got me desperate!

Fireflight - What I've Overcome

This song speaks to me so deeply...







What I've Overcome lyrics

I've got this passion
It's something I can't describe
It's so electric
It's like I've just come alive

I feel this freedom
Now that my past is erased
I feel the healing
I've found the meaning of grace
(I've found grace)

If only You come see me yesterday
Who I used to be before I change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words can't explain
How good it finally feels to break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome

I know I stumble
I know I still face defeat
This second chance is
What will define me

So I'm moving forward
I'm standing on my two feet
I've got momentum
I've got someone saving me
(got someone saving me)

If only You come see me yesterday
Who I used to be before I change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words cant explain
How good it finally feels to break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome

I make mistakes and I might fall
But I won't break
I've got someone saving me

If only You could see me yesterday
Who I used to be before I change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words cant explain
How good it finally feels to break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome
I'm what I've overcome
I'm what I've overcome

Digital Art: Tattoo: Ultimate Love

Tattoo: Ultimate Love by ~backburnerstudio on deviantART

I've designed several tattoos for other people, but never had the guts to get one myself. I figured if I ever did get something, it needed to be something that really represented me and what I was about. So one night, I was playing around on the Paint program in my computer and drew out this design in simple black and white pixels. It just sort of manifested itself amongst the long night of listening to bands like Fireflight, Flyleaf, and Demonhunter. I couldn't sleep, so I just kept working on it... all the while, thinking about God, my life... faith... how he's always been there, guiding me... carrying me a good bit of the way...

After the drawing was finished, Kevin ran it through Photoshop and cleaned it up a good bit. I took that black and white, cleaned-up version and started playing around in Photoshop with it myself. This is what I produced.

One day, I may find a tattoo artist who can at least replicate the black and white version. If so, I just may get my first tattoo... one that represents me and my faith.

Jenn's Owl

Jenn's Owl by ~backburnerstudio on deviantART

My sister, Jennifer, loves owls. I think the mini-obsession probably started with Hedwig when she began reading the Harry Potter books almost ten years ago (hard to believe they're that old now!) I drew this owl, then traced him onto tracing paper, filled it in with black, and then scanned him into the computer. In photoshop, I colored him digitally. (Still learning PS, so I played around a bit.) The original drawing is still just black and white, so that I could color him again for more practice.

Ticket Stub Diary

Love this! Excellent gift idea too :)

Polyvore: "so jesparo"

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Set of 6 coasters from motherboards - Great gift for IT, computer...
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It's Not About Me

I always loved a fresh, new... clean notebook or journal. The only problem was that I sort of collected them. I began afresh with one and all hopes and dreams lay before me. All I needed to do was notate them everyday in my new notebook... my new beginning. The world was a blank canvas. I have found later in life, that I do this too with sketch pads. Why is the first day/ page so exciting while the remaining pages/ days dwindle to a ...  ??
... so many pages untouched.
I'd say, "This is it! Every day I will write. I'll fill up this book this time. It's my committment." Only, months later, the once precious treasure gathered dust as it lay under my bed.

I gave it too much of my faith. That misplaced faith in my notebook's power for a new beginning, belonged in God.

The Purpose Driven Life
--by Rick Warren


Day One: "It All Starts With God"

      For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible... everything got started in him and finds its purpose in him. 
            -- Colossians 1:16 (Msg)

It's not about me. Wow! That's profound really. It's NOT about me. The more I think about it, the more it starts to click.

I've started over so many times...
Why do I crave a fresh start? Because I've messed up so many times.

It stands to reason as well, that I've continued to get it wrong because my methods and way of thinking were grossly inaccurate. So in that simple statement, I find profound new insite into my overall problem, my focus has been all wrong. It's simply not about me. It's about God's purpose and God's purpose for me. 

"You were made by God and for God- and until you understand that, life will never make sense."


egocentric- adjective 
1. Holding the view that the ego is the center, object, and norm of all experience.
2.
   a. Confined in attitude or interest to one's own needs or affairs.
   b. Caring only about oneself; selfish.
3. Philosophy
   a. Viewed or perceived from one's own mind as a center.
   b. Taking one's own self as the starting point in a philosophical system

It's natural to have an egocentric view to life. However, "the purpose of life is far greater than personal fulfillment... To discover your purpose in life you must turn to God's Word, not the world's wisdom."


I wandered lost in the darkness of discontentment for too long. I knew there was a path beneath my feet, but I had no idea where it led. It felt as if I were only able to see the path itself, just around my feet, and nothing more. With God, I know that my path is in his hands. My dad gave me something once that had this inscription on it:

"You may not know all the details of your journey, or clearly see where the trail is leading, but God will always give you enough light to take the next step." --Roy Lessin

I have faith that God will show me my purpose. I just have to keep in mind, it's not about me.